Wednesday, 6 May 2009

The Elder

I have never understood posing for photographs. It seems so odd to me to interrupt the natural flow of a moment to face the camera to appear 'happy'. But here I am in this photo doing exactly that.

We had some friends over yesterday for afternoon tea and were joined by three generations of my family: my mum, my grandfather and my niece. Just before they left I asked my mum to take this photo.

I love my grandfather so much. He'll be 91 in July. He is doing OK since my grandmother died in January. His body is aging but my how sharp his mind is.

It's funny, I was happy to have this traditionally posed photo of us taken, but one of the things I struggle with is the traditions that he represents that I am not interested in. It would make him happy if I settled down, got married and had a baby. It would make him feel better if we had a mezuzah on the doorframe of our house. It would make him worry less if I found full-time work. 

Most of me wants him to respect my adult decisions, but there's still a part of me that doesn't want to upset him by rejecting his historical lore.

4 comments:

(Text)ure and (me)aning said...

Its interesting isnt it..
You have a supportive stable relationship.
You have a home.
You are a parent.
You work hard, passionately and consistently.
You love and support your family.
You have a community.
You honor your heritage and are generous with all that you know and learn...

Why is it we never feel 'enough'?

You grandfather leans slightly forward it the photo
like he is announcing you, he looks proud of you.

Umatji said...

Meg, I really know what you mean - made me think of my mother so much. Despite her being so similar to me and so 'contemporary' in her views, she would just love me to get married and a part of me wants to do it just for her. Her having pneumonia at the moment certainly doesn't help my rational thought! At any rate we all line up for family photos for her too!

SHOKOOFEH said...

I have few things to say:
1.I think you're beautiful. I mean it.
2.I love the color of your hair.
3.Zeida(?)'s face makes me feel smile.

Doctor Plog said...

This post makes me miss my Zaida but feel so happy for you and yours and the time you spend together, differences in opinion notwithstanding. Generational boundaries can sometimes never be crossed but the bonds of love are far stronger. And one of the things I love about you is how much you love your family. xxx